Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Hurricane Dean Downgraded, Renamed "Hurricane Weenie"

Hurricane Dean, which was expected to be a mighty storm ready to thrash Texas with mighty winds and uproot thousands of trailers and pink flamingos, has apparently lost steam. The once mighty winds have been renamed Hurricane Weenie.

President Bush expressed his disappointment in the situation stating, "Dag gum carn sarn it, I was dang sure ready to send troops, bottled water and chewin' tobacky down home to make up fer that Katrina fuck up I dern did!"

"It's just mighty dag nab disappointin' when we can git ourselves a good ol' whopper of a hurricane a hootin' and a hollerin' down there in Texas, and it just done does peters out on ya," Bush griped almost incoherently.

News Time USA caught up with Hurricane Weenie to ask why the sudden lack of enthusiasm when moving to trash one of the largest states in the Union?

"Well, I don't know...after Mexico I kinda felt...well...whats the point? The place already looks like a dump anyway...if anything it would be an improvement. Anyway, I've been considering a career change. Maybe a tornado? Or just a light thunderstorm? Being a hurricane is overrated anyway...too much competition."

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